Ug. Spare me.
TV news is getting harder and harder to watch. I’m not talking about the natural disasters, personal miseries and constant flow of global atrocities. It’s the stations, anchors and correspondents that make me want to tune out. I long for the days when newsmen sat at a desk and told you what you needed to know. Why is it in vogue for anchors to stand up all the time? Is it supposed to make the news more fun? It doesn’t. Sit down, please, just sit the hell down. Easy on the banter. Standing and chatting doesn’t draw me into the conversation and you’re not half as charming or witty as you think you are. Quit it with the queer sound effects and Top 40 songs. And spare me the citizen journalism; if I want to get my information from some amateur shmo with a goofy handle I’d go online.
The Internet is also where anonymous tweets and personal-opinion emails need to stay. “‘We need better healthcare reform,’ says @robbyray” is not news and I don’t care what Carol29 thinks about Tiger’s divorce. Astonishingly, Saturday Night Live pretty much hit it on the head this weekend. Spot on. Funny? Meh. But spot on:
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Way to go with the astute commentary, guys. Anchors, take note.
Anyone who’s a fan of NBC’s Thursday night line up has likely noticed that while The Office might have jumped the shark when it let Pam and Jim get together and tried to give the former “depth,” newcomers Community and Amy Poehler’s Parks and Recreation have significantly stepped it up after faltering first seasons. (Naturally, 30 Rock is still gold. Just gold.)
Community has really grown on me. Joel McHale, E!’s cute and witty nearly-Talk-Soup host, does a great job in the lead role. And Ken Jeong — remember the crazy naked Chinese guy from The Hangover? — has hit his stride as the quasi-evil Señor Chang. And of course, there’s Chevy Chase, who’s almost being written to adequately. But it’s probably pop-culture obsessed Abed, played by Danni Pudi, who gets me the most. At the end of each episode, he and Troy (Donald Glover) close up the show with 30 seconds of bizarre but understated hilarity that makes it seem like they’ve been a comedy team for years, though I can find no evidence that they have.
This one killed me. It combines three of my favorite things: Batman, candy and talking about candy. Hard to beat that. Enjoy.
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CNN’s really going all out to cover this Austin plane crash story. So all out, in fact, that they’re apparently Googling for anything they can find on the suicide pilot Joseph Andrew Stack. And, yes, of course they’re using to the fullest all the technology in the newsroom, from the shmancy big board to desktop PCs. Sometimes, though, when you’re toggling between windows, you might accidentally broadcast more than you meant to. Like search results that include music from the A-Team and the song title “Last Real Nigga Left.”
The broadcaster realized it and quickly opened a new window, but you can’t be too fast for my DVR.
A similar R-rated misstep took place last night during NBC’s Olympic coverage. It had just become clear that Shaun White had won the gold, and the cameras were rolling at the top of the hill as the news set in and he prepared for a victory run down the pipe. You could clearly hear White say “I can’t ride right now!” and wonder aloud if he should just ride through the middle. You could also hear his coach, once White decided to showcase his crazy McTwist, tell him to “stomp the shit out of it.”
Sometimes I really love live TV.
There I am doing an innocent Google search for the latest on the Conan/Jay debacle when I notice results ensconced in freakin’ talk-bubble-boxes (see yellow highlighting):
Not OK, Google. If I wanted to search Twitter I would have fucking searched fucking Twitter. As if I didn’t feel had enough by this Conan craziness, now you gotta go search-resulting me comic-book style? F you, dude. Like I’d want to get my TV entertainment news from some hip hop radio station. Or this guy. Totally lame.
Bigger picture, this is an unnerving turn in the world of internet search. That may sound dramatic. But. It’s hard enough as it is to click a credible source online without the Twitter vomit of no-name bozos appearing directly below legitimate news results — which are of questionable reliability to begin with, and yet the best we’ve got to go on. Throw a rock in the air you’re bound to hit someone stupid. Throw a query in the Cloud you’re bound to hit his latest tweet. Blerg.