Do you know how to spell Cincinnati when you type it into the Google search bar? If so you’re probably interested in finding out about the Reds or the Bengals, or you’re looking to read a story in the Cincinnati Enquirer.
Are you trying to look up something about this fine American city, but are unfamiliar with the proper spelling? Then you’re probably gross.
Honestly I don’t really know what to make of this. Why is it almost entirely in Spanish?
Even if you don’t speak-a the spanish, it’s not too hard to decipher what la gente is searching for: funny videos, adult videos, videos of captured Puerto Rican drug lord Jose David Figuera Agosto, and of New York-born Dominican band Aventura, who made their way from the Bronx, to the Lower East Side via Chico’s mural artistry, to MSG and beyond.
In fact, I think more translating is needed to figure out what the English-language searches are getting at. Um, you guys know you’re already online, right?
Posted in Google Game
Tagged aventura, chico, figuera agosto, google search, pornography, spanish to english, translations, videos
…and they respect those who serve for our country. Either that, or our troops are heading overseas armed with rubbery anatomical recreations. Talk about an arsenal. (Oh!)
Honorable mention to this sign on the News & Video’s side wall:
Remember, you must be 18 years of age and share their sensibilities to enter. No children, no pansies.
Posted in Shoot the Messenger
Tagged fleshlights, military, pornography, signs, texas
The real news here? Ladies, we’ve obliterated the latex ceiling.
But seriously, is that graphic blow up of a diseased snatch really necessary? And reported where, AVN? (Don’t open that at work. FYI: AVN Magazine is described by its publisher as the Bible of the adult industry.)
[via Gizmodo via 9Gag via TheNextWeb]
Posted in Information Stupor Highway, Unhappy Media
Tagged latex ceiling, pornography, statistics, stds
Riding high on Halloween candy — that I purchased for half-price at the drug store yesterday — and finding that my yen for sugar is virtually insatiable, I endeavored to sate it virtually.
I was a surprised to find a dearth of literally-sugar-related material, though these adorable little sugar gliders helped satisfy my searching’s sweet tooth:
Seriously. How cute are we?
Then hit a twinge of sour, however, as I was reminded of how many of my countrymen love country music. And Sugar Ray.
Most everything else in Google’s suggestions looked somewhat familiar. Except sugardoodle, aka SugarDoodle.com. So I took a gander. The site’s header says, “Growing Together [est. 2005].” I scrolled down the page, not understanding what I was looking at, and found an old school visitors counter: 24,757,355. Nearly 25 million in under five years. Not bad. But what is it all about? I read a bit more, a bit here a bit there, and I started to find answers… from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.
Posted in Google Game
Tagged candy, country music, latter day saints, mormons, polygamy, pornography, regret, sugar, sugar gliders, sugar ray, sugardoodle, sugarland, sweet
No Happy Medium 