Category Archives: Shoot the Messenger

Marketing and advertising.

But throw in someone getting hit in the balls and I’m sold

I saw this Visa commercial recently and, watching blank-faced as a portly man danced goofily, but not remotely entertainingly in a hotel room, I wondered if people really still think that it’s inherently funny to see fat people dance.

Then, while I was on the YouTube enjoying the comedy stylings of my friend Joe Minolfi at Carolines — funny stuff — I got distracted by one of the “related” video suggestions on the right side of the page.

minolfi grab

This video, called My Humps, posted by user fatboygetdown, is clearly just two minutes and thirty-five seconds of a fat boy getting down (to the Black Eyed Peas). Why would I want to see this? Better question: Why have over one million one hundred and ninety thousand people watched it?

Oh, right, because people really still think that it’s inherently funny to see fat people dance. Sigh.

It’s Mid-Morning, Grab a Straw


I’m a bit confused about this Diet Coke internet banner ad. Can we discus briefly? As far as I can tell it’s suggesting that:

a. You should eat some meal at 11:01. I have to assume that’s AM.

b. That meal should be smart and fresh, like a salad.

c. To accompany your post-breakfast, pre-noon salad you should down a Diet Coke.

I get the feeling that some time in the future people are going to look back at this the way we look back at Coke ads from the days when Coke actually contained coke.

A Message from Nanja Eboko, Exchange Student from Cameroon

Apologies that I’m not savvy enough to post this video like a proper blogger would, but please believe me that this is worth a click. My roommate and I managed to catch this commercial for Cameroon last Wednesday night during Conan. Prime broadcast real estate on a major network — just keep that in mind while you watch. It’s the third video listed on the Come to Cameroon website. Here’s a teaser: The spot begins, “Strategically located within Africa, Cameroon … combines political stability with enormous reserves of natural resources…”

cameroon

As my viewing partner astutely noted, Cameroon seems to be giving Kazakhstan a run for its money.

Despite Lagging Sales, Obama Crap Not Totally Uncool Yet

Any time is Obama time.

It's always Obama time.

Thank you to the AP and my good friend Chaniga Vorasarun over at Tonic.com for addressing a question I’ve been mulling on for a while, but was too lazy to answer for myself. Are people still buying Obama stuff? Says Vorasarun:

The president sells. At least, he used to. Prior to last year’s election, you couldn’t walk two feet without seeing the face of our future president on t-shirts, gazing towards the future in Shepard Fairey’s ubiquitous rendering, on mugs, looking concerned, even popping out of a box, as in Barack-in-a-box.

But now, after the glow of the first 100 days have worn off – and in its place have come debates over health care, climate change and the war in Afghanistan – some Obama-based entrepreneurs tell the Associated Press that sales of presidential merchandise have also waned.

Chani, I know you know this, but you’ve been on the West Coast too long. Come home and walk down 14th Street at Union Square with me and I promise you will be hit in the face (possibly literally) with Obamabilia, as you say, or Baratchotkes as I do. (OK, I’ve never said that before. But I might now – if it weren’t so tongue-twisty.)

It shouldn’t be surprising at all that sales are finally waning. Rather, I find it shocking that there are still sales to speak of. Maybe I haven’t lived through enough presidencies — Clinton and Little Bush haven’t helped my Executive Branch batting average — but I can’t think of any other instance where the merchandising of our Commander in Chief had such market saturation. The only comparably iconic presidential products I can think of are I Like Ike buttons or Nixon masks, and the latter really has Point Break to thank.

Whenever I walk down card-table-lined streets in the city I’m amazed that nearly a year after the election Obamamania yet rages, at least from a retail market standpoint. It’s pretty normal to sport your candidate’s moniker across the chest of a 50/50 poly-cotton blend before the nation heads to the polls, but it’s nigh on 2010 and Obama shirts and bags and pins and posters — and apparently the occasional jack-in-the-box, the creepiest of children’s toys — are still being shilled and shelled out for.

Eventually Obama the clothing line will go the way Umbros and Big Johnson, but for now our first celebrity president has the merch presence of a touring rock star. I guess that makes wearing Obama gear like boasting “I saw them at CBGBs in ’83.” And everyone wants a chance to say I Was There.

Unhappy On On Langage On Un-Language

This weekend’s New York Times Magazine On Language column, written by Ben Zimmer (in for Sir Safire) looks at what Zimmer calls “the age of undoing,” the preponderance of backformed words created by tacking a convenient un- to the front of everything.

The article begins:

“What’s done cannot be undone,” moaned Lady Macbeth in her famous sleepwalking scene. If she woke up in the 21st century, she would be pleased to discover that whatever can be done can be undone, too.

Or perhaps it just seems that way in the new social spaces we are carving for ourselves online. On popular Web sites devoted to social networking, innovative verbs have been springing up to describe equally innovative forms of interaction: you can friend someone on Facebook; follow a fellow user on Twitter; or favorite a video on YouTube. Change your mind? You can just as easily unfriend, unfollow or unfavorite with a click of the mouse.

The recent un- trend has also seeped into the world of advertising. KFC is marketing its new Kentucky Grilled Chicken with the tagline “UNthink: Taste the UNfried Side of KFC.” The cellphone company MetroPCS challenges you to “Unlimit Yourself,” while its competitor Boost Mobile wants you to get “UNoverage’D” and “UNcontract’D” (ridding yourself of burdensome overage fees and contracts). Even victims of the financial downturn can seek solace in un-: ABC broadcast a special report in May telling viewers how to get “Un-Broke.”

It goes on to trace the un-ing of words back to some linguistic genesis, one rooted largely in the electronic world. Forsooth, there once was a time when the “Undo” command was novel. But what interests me more than their digital-etymological rise are the cultural connotations of these words, and what they signify beyond their definitions.

Take, first, Zimmer’s advertising and ABC examples: UNfried, UNlimit, UNoverage’D, UNcontract’D and Un-Broke. What I see here is more than clever marketing, but the display of a pervading sense of dissatisfaction. Typically, branding serves consumers (that’s us) with aspirational images. Beer will make you cool and popular, makeup will make you beautiful, etcetera, ad infinitum. Buy this, become better. But these un- slogans are not about becoming what you want; they’re about un-becoming what you are and wish you weren’t.

Continue reading

Mantys for Your Putts

mantysEngadget featured this golf-course transporter. Who even cares how dumb the product is, or how dumb you’d look riding one down the fairway? What I want to know is: Who the fuck’s idea was it to name the thing Mantys?

mantys manties

Mantys: Never lose track of your balls again.

Keeps Your Hands Free to Pen Shoddy Copy!

Forget the hype. I don’t want to wax philosophical on the troubling societal implications of Snuggie’s ascendancy to national renown. I’d just like to take a quick red-pen look at this magazine ad:

downsized_0920091514

I’m confused. Is this, perhaps, meant to say “Get Your Snuggie On”? Shouldn’t it? I’m just sayin.

I mean, those people look like they’re getting their Snuggie(s) on, don’t they? (Whatever that means.) I guess it could just be telling the reader to put on his Snuggie like a mother telling a kid to put on his coat. Though my mom probably would have said, “get your coat on” rather than “get on your coat.” Maybe it’s an instruction to get onto your Snuggie. Sit on it. Mount it. Ew, I’m done with this line of reasoning.

So, is this clever, or just awkward? Well if that isn’t the crux of the Snuggie itself.

Star Rises, Credit Score Hovers, Hope for the Future Plummets

Can’t stand ’em, can’t help by sing along with ’em, want to kill ’em or fuck ’em or both, there’s sadly no denying the thoroughness with which the freecreditreport.com guys have permeated the pop culture bubble. The latest commercial features faux frontman Eric Violette getting stuck with a crappy cell phone as a result of his crappy credit. I’ll pretend it didn’t occur to me that the slick 80s brick with the Gordon Gekko/Zach Morris pedigree doesn’t appeal to a certain late-twenties-probably-broke-ish demographic. But I barely had time to consider the fact, as I was quickly distracted by how long the singer’s hair has gotten.

Like he thinks he’s some kind of rock star. Like he is some kind of rock star. Oh my god, is this guy some kind of rock star?

  • You recognize his face immediately.
  • You know the lyrics to his songs.
  • You know the order in which those songs were released (more or less).
  • You have strong feelings one way or another about him and them and…

sing along

or

change the channel…

quickly and quietly

or

while spitting expletive-laden vitriol about how much you hate these fucking commercials and these fucking songs and that fucking guy.

An iconic singer who compels a whole country to react, and to feel. Rings suspiciously of rock stardom to me. Shudder.

You might be thinking, “Oh please, we can tell the difference between a rock star and some TV-ad hack.” Maybe you can, but think of the children.

For the love of all things holy. For the future of this great nation. Think of the children.

Yabba Dabba Doo You Have A Light?

Recent news reports say that in his latest crack-down Bloomberg is aiming to ban smoking in all NYC parks. OK, so to review: we’ve got a commie president, and a fascist New York mayor looking for a third term, which I assume will be when he solidifies, once and for all, his despot foothold. I’m overwhelmed here.

With all the tumult and terror and finger-wagging going on around us, I’d like to take you back to a simpler time. A time when men were men, and women stayed home and made dinner. When prehistoric birds opened your beer for you, and popular cartoon characters smoked with abandon. Here, a montage of sponsor clips from the original Flintstones, brought to you by Winston Cigarettes.

[Found the clip while perusing this worth-a-gander post from Slashfood.com.]

Windows 7 ad charms with killer combo: little girl, kitten in marshmallows, Final Countdown

Quick check-in on Microsoft’s latest marketing efforts. While “cute kids” typically send me running in the other direction, this one is working for me.

I mean, child’s into unicorns and Europe, and I can relate to that.

I am reponkysliv to this commercial.